Bodyguard. Needn’t I say more?

Few things I would advise you to carry along if you are planning to go for this movie:

•         Rotten Tomatoes
•          Rotten eggs
•         Shoes, chappal, etc.

Well, these are just a few suggestions. You can come up with your new innovative ideas to display your anger and frustration. I am too lazy to rack my brains for that purpose. But if you are the cool temperament types, you know the lazy ones (like me) then just carry a blanket. That’d be it. Instead of massacring your time and energy yelling to express your irritation, just wrap the blanket and go off to sleep. That’s exactly what I did. After 20 minutes, the peeps around me could hear my loud snores.

Nothing and I’m very serious here, NOTHING about the movie was good or new. Since I was napping throughout, my friend who is a die-hard Salman fan literally took the pain to tell me the story. Imagine my relief. Thank goodness I dozed. But then again, you can’t expect logic, meaning, class, humane or anything realistic of any Salman flick. As far as Kareena Kapoor is considered, she could pull off that kind of role even if she was sleepwalking.

There is this buzz that this could have been Salman’s hat trick. After Wanted and Dabanng. But then wasn’t it? Well for me it was. All three of them were futile. And all three of them were superbly effective in giving me an abysmal headache. I swear I’m not making this up but I actually got temperature after watching Dabanng.

And what’s with this craze of Salman taking off his shirt and boasting his body? Believe me; I like it more when Taylor Lautner removes his shirt to show his 8 pack *drools*. Now don’t you judge me by this. I don’t like Twilight. But I like Taylor Lautner. Yes, I do.

Anyway, coming back to Bodyguard, I have to mention this. I saw Not-So-Lovely Singh (read: Salman Khan) do this move in some song where he is making his muscles do the dancing. No Sallu, even your muscles can’t dance. My vote still goes to Pappu.

To conclude, The Kareena Kapoor, Salman Khan Starrer Bodyguard is a big dud. My advice would be: Don’t go for this. Don’t waste your bucks on this one. Rather sleep. Your dreams won’t be as boring as this is. In the Bodyguard style - ‘Mujphe ek ehsaan karna, ke aisi aur koi movies mat banana.’

P.S. – This is my personal opinion. You may disagree to it. But that will still not make Bodyguard a “good’ movie.